Saturday, August 23, 2008

What a day...

After getting a text at work that my son was taking LK to the hospital because of chest pains and clamminess, I have not had such a good day. After most of the day in the emergency room, LK has a clean bill of health and was told it must be viral. I am sure I will have the heart attack once the ER bill comes since we have no insurance.

This, however, has made me feel better. I love dogs and babies.

I need a beer.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Personal Statement

I like to wear hats.

I don't often wear them because people look at me when I do.

I don't like people looking at me.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Basic Instinct

I admit to not being all up-to-date like Beckeye. I used to have a life that didn't revolve around screens (t.v., internet, sun), so forgive me if I haven't seen the movie Basic Instinct before last night.

I have to ask... What the hell was that piece of crap? Did it really become popular just because of the sex scenes and no panties? I admit to having watched it on regular telly so I missed most of those, which I doubt would have changed my mind.

This was a horrible piece of drivel that had plot holes bigger than Sharon's Vajayjay.

We Would Also Like Ownership of Your Firstborn

I am still in the process of finding gainful employment. Never, ever, having had an issue getting a job before, this is becoming a very frustrating time. Frustrating enough to start applying for jobs that pay very, very little.

If you haven't searched for employment lately you may not realize that they really do not want to even see you in person at all. It is all done on the interwebs and any attempt to offer to bring in a resume and application in person is treated as if you are a leper with a third eye coming in to disembowel them.

I received my first phone call yesterday expressing interest and asking me to fill out another, more in depth application they had just sent, which I excitedly did. Extremely low pay, but good perks.

This morning there is another application to be filled out. This application is for a pre-employment background check. Now I understand in this day and age these things need to be done, but thought this would be AFTER an interview, after I had decided whether I wanted to work there and after they had decided they would like me to work there. What if I was a leper with a third eye? Have a goiter the size of Rhode Island? Wouldn't they want to know that ahead of time? One would think.

Instead, this company wants to know everywhere I have lived in the last 7 years, names used, and my social security number. They want my social security number BEFORE I know if I want to work there.

Oh, and the real kicker? By filling out this application I agree to let them look at my credit report any time they like for the length of my employment. Really? Taking my pee isn't enough? Doing a full credit and background check before employment the interview not enough? (not a bank, where this might make sense) Do I submit a DNA sample upon offer of employment and agree to let them clone me in perpetuity? How about the fact that this job pays $9 per hour?! NINE DOLLARS AN HOUR and they want to invade my privacy any time they like.

"I acknowledge that a telephonic facsimile or copy of this release shall be valid as the original. This release is valid for all federal, state, county and local agencies and authorities. I have the right to make a written request within a reasonable period of time for complete and accurate disclosure of additional information concerning the nature and scope of the investigation. I also authorize Chump Change Employment to obtain my consumer report for employment purposes at any time during the tenure of my employment."

What the hell is wrong with this picture and where is our privacy going? Do I have to bring in my trash can every week so they may investigate how much I recycle? Will they require a camera in our bedroom as well, because happy employees are good employees?

I was looking forward to being employed and having a break from owning our own business for awhile. It really is a 24x7 job with no sick days and no vacations, so weekends off and verbal discourse with people having teeth was something I had been looking forward to. I am now hoping to restart our business within the next calendar year because not having someone with a microscope up your ass is high on my list of priorities.

(on a different note, Where in the World is Doorknob Dan? I had only just started to stalk read him and was planning on adding him to my blogroll and I cannot locate him.)

Monday, August 18, 2008

Presidential Material

Can I vote for this woman for President!?

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Things that make you go, hmmmm...

During an interview about his upcoming roast, Mr Sagat reveals that he is really Pistols at Dawn.

"AP: What kind of music would you like to have in the background if you did do a heart-to-heart?

Saget: I guess something by Journey with Steve Perry because they had the synthesizers all down really well. It was all about the synth."

Really, now, Mr Dawn, I mean, Sagat? All about the synth? Methinks that says it all right there.

Friday, August 15, 2008

Alrighty Then...

I warned you before that I would be returning someday and force you to look at pictures you didn't want to see. Well, I am posting them again to force you to look at my Cuteness Overlords. While I know that some of you do not have/do not want/hate the thought of humanoids such as these, you will have to suck it, cuz here they are in all their glory once again, mainly because I am old and senile and I don't have anything to kick off my inaugural posting here on Leonesse Roars.

Now, please let yourself be known so I can add you to my new blogroll!